If there is one thing that I could do for hours and hours on end, it’s listen to music. Music is one of the most comforting companions. There are songs for just about every mood. A day without music for me in unimaginable. On the way to work, in the background while at work, on the way home from work, while I’m cooking dinner and then doing work after dinner. If I’m cleaning, music is probably just about as loud as I think I could make it before my family wants to kill me. As I write this, the speaker in my kitchen is cranking out music from my daily mix on Spotify.
By now I think that most people who know me are used to me quoting songs, breaking out in song because someone said something and it made me think of a song. My wife will often test me on songs she has Shazamed (Shazam is an app that will tell you want song is playing). I’ll be teaching and a song will pop into my mind and I’ll have sing a bit of it as my students look at their crazy teacher sing off-key as if it were just another normal part of our lesson.
Without music, life would be a mistake.
Friedrich Nieitzsche
I didn’t have much in common with my father but the one thing we did share was a love of music. Like me, he was always listening to music. His favorite was music from the 1950’s and 1960’s but also like me, he could appreciate just about any kind of music. His first cousin, Mort Shuman, was an incredible songwriter who wrote songs for Elvis Presley, Dion, Fabian and The Drifters, to name a few. My father was so proud of this and maybe that was what made him enjoy that music so much or maybe he, like me, just felt that music was almost as necessary as breathing. Whatever it was, we shared this. Here’s a true story about us. On a cruise to Canada, my dad had put my name on a piece of paper to participate in an on-board game show. I was so angry that he put my name on that paper because the last thing I wanted to do was to be on a stage on a cruise ship. Naturally, my name was called and I told him that since he put my name on the paper, he had to be the one who went up on stage with me. Who could have known that the first questions would be something like name that tune? The first one, Madonna. I got that in like half a note. Don’t even insult me. The next, Ace of Base. (This should also tell you about when this was – about 20 years ago). We were unstoppable and we won it all – champagne, lithographs, a ship on a stick and excursions. Now that I think of this, it is probably one of the best memories that I have of us together.
Something I sadly have to admit is that I lack any and all musical abilities. Some people are born with it, some can learn to develop their abilities. I, on the other hand, have never been able to learn to read music, play music or sing well. Nonetheless, I have a deep, emotional connection with music and honestly, I am perfectly happy just singing along (badly) to every single song.
So how does this fit in with being grateful as an Italian-American? Well, no genre of music has ever truly turned me off. I can appreciate just about any kind of music but Italian music has a place in my life that other music can’t live up to.
When I first decided to learn the language of my grandparents, I didn’t realize that taking courses would not be enough and that music would quickly fill that void. After my first two courses, I realized that I needed more input. I needed input that would be more appealing to me. Input that I could interact with and that would bring me to the next level. Enter Laura Pausini and many artists to follow.
I bought my first Italian music CD at Tower Records. For more on this story, check out my post, You should be streaming Italian music!. This CD by Laura Pausini changed my life because it introduced me to the best way for me to learn the language. Laura’s voice literally sand to me and made me want to know what she was singing. After that, I listened to other artists and watched the Sanremo Music Festival. I built my collection and my vocabulary. I do believe that it changed my trajectory and helped me achieve success in the language and eventually become a language teacher. To this day, I use music whenever possible to help my students because I know that music has the power to take your comprehension skills to a new level. So many of my students have downloaded songs that we have discussed in class and knowing that makes my heart sing. They also get a huge kick out of watching their teacher make a fool of himself singing and dancing along to the music. And they know if a new Laura Pausini song comes out, there is no way we’re not going to listen to it. And that happened just a little over a week ago, when Io sì came out. You just cannot deny her voice (and if you need a translation- she has a English version but nothing will compare to the Italian version.
I truthfully never thought I would ever be so grateful for technology. I will admit that although I am not so old, I have always been wary, if not downright suspicious, of technology. Technology should make things better and innovative in my opinion. I don’t use technology in my classroom just for the sake of using technology. A worksheet on the computer is exactly the same as it is on paper. However, I have learned that technology can be used for good and can be an invaluable tool that can keep us informed and connected.
“Technology is best when it brings people together.”
Matt Mullenweg, Social Media Entrepreneur
Social Media
Way back when I joined Facebook, I was a bit uncomfortable about sharing mostly because it was new and I don’t always deal well with new. After a while, I realized that Facebook could be a perfect way for me to be connected to people I don’t see often, like relatives in Italy. It was a perfect (and inexpensive) way to stay in touch with cousins I had met when I was in Italy and get to know others who I hadn’t met. My Facebook presence waned a bit when I discovered Twitter. On Twitter, I realized that I could customize information that came at me and also build a PLN (Professional Learning Network) with other language teachers across the world. This helped me to become a better language teacher and have a large sounding board for ideas. The idea to do this blog challenge came from Samara Spielberg, who I follow on Twitter. Recently, I joined Instagram. Instagram has given me a new view of social media. I’m sure that Whatsapp is not new to many but nonetheless, it helps me to stay in contact with my family and friends in Italy without spending a penny! All of these platforms help me to be informed about what is going on in Italy and have given me the opportunity to connect with different people who have been inspiring in their own way.
Spotify
A world without music for me would be a very sad one. Up until very recently, I have been purchasing music through iTunes and have sometimes been frustrated that Apple wouldn’t allow me to purchase a song because I didn’t live in Italy or for some reason the artist only made the song available on a premium streaming service. When my older son showed me how to use Spotify and told me he already paid for his subscription but we could have a family account for very little additional money, I tried it and I have to say, since I have been using it, I haven’t listened once to my music on iTunes. I love that I can find almost every song I could think of and thanks to my Daily Mixes, songs I didn’t know about or hadn’t thought of. I listen mostly to Italian music so Spotify gives me the access I crave.
In addition to the music aspect of Spotify, I have also begun to follow some podcasts. I had been following the Italian American Podcastsince they debuted and I enjoy their show because of the content and their dedication to all aspects of Italian-American life. If you haven’t already been listening, it’s time to tune in! Through Spotify, I can follow podcasts and have one place to go and listen to them. I have added additional podcasts like Italiano Automatico, Leggiamo in Italiano and Pillole di Italiano. These have also helped to keep my language refreshed and current while also helping to give me some great ideas to use in my classroom. If you’re looking to help with your Italian language, give Spotify a try.
This, by no means is an exhaustive list but rather the first things that come to mind when I think about being grateful for how technology keeps me connected to my heritage and culture. What technology do you use to keep you connected to your Italian-American heritage and culture?
Although this year has been a very tough one for many of us, that doesn’t mean that we have to be consumed by despair. It is all too easy to give in to negative feelings and to let it fester in us until it becomes downright depressing. When I saw a post by a fellow language teacher, Samara Spielberg (@SamaraSpielberg on Twitter), in which she explained that she would be participating in a 30-day gratitude challenge that she had created with her students, I was immediately taken by the idea. What a great idea! This can be both educational and restorative. It’s not that I hadn’t discussed gratitude in my language classes before, but this year it seems as if we could certainly benefit from this so I decided to do something very similar with my students in an effort to help them better their language skills and to boost our morale in these very uncertain times.
At first, when I started to think about what kind of blog post I was going to work on this weekend, I had a bit of a block. I had a bunch of ideas but not sure any of them were exactly what I was feeling this week and then I had a thought, what if I did something similar to what I was asking my students to do but with a bit more focus? And so this is how I decided to make my own 30-day Italian-American Gratitude Challenge; focusing on the things that I am grateful for. My goal is to post every day in November and my hope is that I will come out of this experience refreshed and appreciative of all I have – a kind of soul reboot in a time when things seem like they can go either way. If you’d like to join me in this challenge, I’d be honored to read your comments.
First and foremost, I have to be thankful for everything that I have and everything that I am because of my family. Their influence, whether positive, negative or somewhere in between, has shaped the person I am. Nobody is perfect but everyone plays a role.
Although not all of my ancestors came from Italy, the ones that did had the strongest influence on me. I felt closest to my maternal grandparents, who had emigrated to the United States in the 1950’s. When I was younger, I would spend a few weeks every summer with them. My grandmother would cook and cook and then cook some more. My grandfather would teach me how to recognize all the plants in his garden (he grew everything) and I would help him to gather the tomatoes, cucumbers, peppers, figs or whatever happened to be ripe at the time. You could never go hungry in that house!
Aside from all the eating, I would play Italian cards, watch tv with them, go for walks with my grandfather and listen to their endless stories of Italy and how they came to America. My grandmother was so proud of me when I wrote a story about her coming to America while I was in elementary school. “My grandson – he wrote the book, ” she would tell people. It was probably no more than one page but she was proud nonetheless. My grandparents had sacrificed and worked hard to create a new and better life for their family. Although their sacrifices might have seemed to be of immediate necessity, their dedication to their family was something that would live on longer than them and hopefully continue throughout all generations to come. My grandmother does have a very interesting story and if you’re interested, check out another post of mine – Our family lives on in their stories.
I always knew that my Italian heritage was important to me. It was, and still is, a large part of who I am. My decision to study Italian in college was not a whim- it was a necessity for me. I wanted to be closer to my heritage and I felt as if I couldn’t fully appreciate it until I immersed myself in the language and traveled to the land of my ancestors. When I first set foot in Italy during my first study abroad experience, I was flooded with emotions I never even knew I had.
Having a family of my own was never a question for me. Sharing my love for all things Italian was just as important to me. It was not long after I began dating my wife, Teresa, that I knew she would be the perfect match for me. She was a first-generation Italian-American, she spoke Italian and shared a love of all things Italian. Although we can be very different, we share the same core values and that’s why our family is so strong.
Teresa’s family welcomed me into their family right away as one of their own – even before we were married. I can honestly say that I have never felt an outsider when I am with them. When I was studying in Italy, I had even gone to stay with some of her family without ever meeting them! They never questioned anything. All they had to know was that Teresa and her family in America trusted and accepted me. It could have been awkward but for some reason, it never felt that way.
My own Italian cousins, who I had not grown up knowing, had also welcomed me as if I had always been a part of their family. I was lucky enough to stay in the town my grandmother grew up in and to be able to visit my grandfather’s hometown as well. And thanks to social media and technology, we are able to stay connected.
I had never seen my grandparents as happy as they were the day of my wedding. It was as if they had understood then how all of their sacrifices had paid off with interest. When my grandmother would later be able to meet my own children, she would often tell me that she never imagined she would meet her great-grandchildren with such pride in her eyes. I am sure that my grandfather would have felt the same if he were here when they were born. Now that they are no longer here, it seems increasingly more important to me to write their story so that it can be recorded forever and will be passed on to my children and hopefully, their future generations.
My grandparents walking into the hall at our wedding
My grandmother at Nico’s communion
Nonna Angelina gets kisses from her great-grandchildren
When my sons were born, I never imagined that I would have been able to feel so much without bursting. They are the reason that I work as hard as I do. I imagine that my grandparents, parents and in-laws felt the same when they began their families. You don’t have to be rich or famous to have a family but having the one I do makes me feel as if I won the lottery. I couldn’t be richer than this.
Last year, Mariapia came to my school as an exchange student. It was the first time that I had had an exchange student in my class. I was both excited and nervous about this. Would she be highly critical of my Italian as a non-native speaker? Would she be frustrated to be in an Italian language class when she was clearly here to better her English? Would this be a unique opportunity for my students? I had so many thoughts before the first day of school in September but soon after, I realized that this would be a learning experience for both of us. I actually invited Mariapia to be critical of my language, my course and my teaching method. I knew I was opening myself up to the highest form of criticism possible for a teacher but in the end, I am glad that I did. We were able to build a rapport and learn from one another.
I have always taught my students about the Italian school system based on what I had learned through my own research and my experiences as a student at the Università degli studi di Firenze in Florence, Italy while earning my Master’s degree. However, having Mariapia in my class was invaluable because she was able to share her experiences with us about the Italian school system. Both Mariapia and her twin sister, Carla, had decided to attend foreign high schools to better their English and of course, to gain an experience that no doubt will end up having an impact on the women they will become.
I recently reached out to Mariapia and asked if both she and her sister would like to answer some questions about their experience. I do realize that this was almost like assigning another homework assignment to the teens but they were more than happy to do it and I am grateful that they decided to share their experiences.
I feel like I’ve been influenced by the portrayal of the U.S. in the media which is obviously very romanticized but honestly, I was not disappointed.
Mariapia, foreign exchange student
Mariapia and Carla both decided to go through EF Language Year Abroad. When I asked Mariapia how they chose this particular program and how they even knew these opportunities existed, she told me that she had first been told by her eighth grade teacher about study abroad opportunities and then had decided to do her own research when she felt ready to participate. She watched YouTube videos and researched different agencies online and found out that EF was having an informational session in Catania, Sicily. After attending this session, they were sold on the program. Both girls had to be interviewed in order to be accepted into the program to assess their level of English and the interviewer agreed that both Mariapia and Carla were very mature and ready to participate in a program like the one EF offered.
“I would like Italian schools to be more “modern” and innovative.”
Carla, foreign exchange student
Carla: “me and my mate George Harrison”
Carla in Liverpool, England
The process of obtaining a visa, getting the necessary vaccinations and finding a host family was a long one but in the end, well worth it. In a phone conversation with Mariapia to ask some additional questions, she told me some interesting stories that I hadn’t originally asked about but I think are worth sharing. First, in order to obtain the visa to study, they had to go to the American Embassy in Naples and answer a lot of questions. One thing that they had to prove was that none of them had ever committed a crime. It turns out that her father shares a name with someone who did commit a crime and it took “quite a while to prove that he wasn’t that person!”
As far as finding and being matched with a host family is also a process. First, you are encouraged to make a video of yourself to help the process. Mariapia was a little stressed with school at the time and never made her video. She did fill out some paperwork where she expressed her interests and goals, however. She tells me that you can choose the state you want to study in for an additional fee, which she declined to pay. Her twin sister, Carla, was matched right away to a family in England. For Mariapia, the process was taking a bit longer. “I was nervous that I wouldn’t be chosen or be matched well since I didn’t make my video,” said Mariapia. And in the end, she was matched with one of my students and says she couldn’t have been happier. “They love theater, have many pets, live on Long Island in New York. I couldn’t believe how perfect this match was,” she goes on to say.
“They wanted me to have fun but also to be careful and mostimportantly, to always answer the phone when they called otherwise they’d start planning my funeral.”
Mariapia, on how her parents felt about her studying in America
Mariapia takes the NYC subway for the first time on a class trip
Here is my interview with the sisters on their experiences. Mariapia chose a six month placement while Carla chose a full year abroad.
Matt: Why did you decide to study English?
Mariapia: First of all, English is a mandatory subject in the Italian school system and I’ve always loved studying it because it helped me connect with my interests: music, movies, books. From a very young age I was surrounded by this language, I even tried to speak it, but of course what came out of my mouth was just gibberish!
Carla: I’ve always enjoyed studying foreign languages, especially English, which I think is very important to know nowadays.
Matt: Why did you choose America or England?Why did you choose a half year or a full year?
Mariapia: I feel like I’ve been influenced by the portrayal of the US in the media (especially on tv) which is obviously very romanticized but, honestly, I was not disappointed. Actually, I love this country even more now that I’ve visited it and got to know it a little more. I chose to do six months instead of the whole year because I used to do theater and I didn’t want to miss my show in June. I regret choosing that for many reasons, but I’ll say this: life doesn’t always go as planned, so carpe diem And just have fun.
Carla: I chose England over America because I’ve always been interested in the British culture and lifestyle, the (widely known) British humour, and above all things, I’ve always loved the British accent. I chose to do the whole year because I knew it would have taken me some time to get used to all the new things around me, and also because I thought that 6 months weren’t enough for me to improve my English.
Matt: What did your parents think about you being so far from home?
Mariapia: My dad didn’t like it one bit, but he trusted me enough to let me go. My mother was happy for me and very excited from the beginning, but also very nervous. They wanted me to have fun but also to be careful and, most importantly, to always answer the phone when they called otherwise they’d start planning my funeral.
Carla: They have always encouraged me and my sisters to travel a lot and to go study abroad if we had the chance, so I guess they were happy about it.
Matt: What did your friends think about you studying abroad?
Mariapia: They were happy for me, although most of them didn’t even know it was a possibility. They even admitted that they were jealous and that made me realize how lucky I was. One of my friends actually visited NYC not even a month before I went there, and she said she was sure I would love it.
Carla: I reckon, most of them had never heard of something like this before, or at least they didn’t know it was possible to study abroad while still in high school, so they were a bit surprised. While others, who knew what that was about, were a bit concerned that I would have basically “missed” one year of school in Italy. But I think after all, they were happy for me.
Matt: What have you found to be the main differences between the schools you attended abroad and your Italian high school?
Mariapia: The biggest difference, in my opinion, is the importance of individuality: in the US, you can choose your classes and “customize” your high school experience according to what your interests are. In Italy, you have to choose an high school that is specialized in a certain field (either science, classical studies, psychology, art, music, etc…) and that’s what you’re gonna study for five years. Another difference is that oral tests aren’t a thing in the US school system, but in Italy they’re fundamental. Also, we have crucifixes instead of flags!
Carla: The main differences I can think of are: 1. Oral tests (or what we call “interrogazioni”) don’t exist in the UK. However, they have a (large and complex) variety of written assessments, compared to Italy. 2. In Italy we start and finish school earlier (usually from 8 am to 1 pm), we don’t have a canteen and we have our lunch at home. But we have school on Saturdays. 3. In Italy you always stay in the same classroom with the same classmates, and it’s the teachers who switch classes. 4. In most English high schools they call teachers by their first name. We only address them as “teacher … ” (But most times you don’t need to say their last name either)
Matt: What things do you prefer about each school?
Mariapia: Personally, I’ve always hated going to school here in Italy, but I loved the American high school experience. I genuinely looked forward to waking up in the morning. The only thing I like about the Italian school system is that we have a longer summer break.
Carla: I prefer the fact that British students have much more free time within the school hours, especially the last two years of school that they can spend however they want (doing their homework in the library so that they’re free in the afternoon or socialising with other students in the common room). However, I would say one thing I prefer about Italian schools is that students are not required to wear a uniform and sometimes they don’t even need to follow a dress code. This certainly gives us the chance to express our individuality.
Matt: What was your experience like with your host family?
Mariapia: I feel like I was very lucky to have been chosen by my host family because from the moment I read their description on the EF platform, I knew that we were a perfect match. We did a lot of fun activities together, we had similar interests and even the simple things, like going to the supermarket or having dinner with them, were just great.
Carla: My host parents were very nice and typical English people. But I must say that, since British host families are paid and they’re not volunteer, it’s hard to believe that they’re hosting international students because they’re genuinely interested in knowing their cultures, and not for money. Especially if they’re hosting more than one student at the time.
Matt: What is something your would like to take from your host high school experience and would like to see implemented into your Italian high school?
Mariapia: I feel like we should use technology more, like you do in the US, because here it’s still underestimated and frowned upon by teachers who are obsessed with tradition/don’t know how to use it. I’d love to see some high school spirit here as well, I never felt like I belonged in my high school but during my brief stay at Comsewogue I was a proud warrior!
Carla: I would like Italian schools to be more “modern” and innovative. We should definitely use computers, or technology in general, more. This can be also a big opportunity to include people who can’t afford to buy all those books and school materials every year.
Matt: Finally, how has this experience changed you?
Mariapia: Hopefully I improved my English, but more importantly I feel like I’ve become more independent and mature. I cherish many wonderful memories of this experience that made my desire to live in the US grow, but I’ll also try to learn from my mistakes and become a better person.
Carla: I think it helped me improving my language skills mainly. But also, being in a foreign country without my parents, it surely made me more independent and more confident to deal with things on my own.
Mariapia having gelato in NYC on a class trip
Mariapia visiting the Central Park Zoo on a class trip
Mariapia wearing the Italian Honor Society crown as our honorary member!
One thing that Mariapia would often say to me while she was here was that she was amazed at how American teachers seem to be so much more invested in their students and truly care about them. She said that American teachers actually care if their students learn or not and this made a lasting impression. I am so glad to have met her and that I could have been a part of her (good) experience here.
I am truly impressed with the level of English that Carla and Mariapia have been able to achieve and the progress they have made because of this unique study abroad experience. Their answers were thoughtful and insightful. They are both well-spoken young ladies who have clearly made the most that this program had to offer them.
